I was told that I should start a Curvy Girl Complications Blog. I want to start by making it clear that I am not trying to disparage skinny women or say they don’t have problems. I am writing this blog as something light hearted and fun. It has taken me many years to come to the realization that all women, skinny, curvy, pear-shaped, etc are perfect as they are. I am not using this a platform to encourage women to lose weight or be a different body type. The only thing that I want to take a stance on is that all women, regardless of shape, should be healthy. I’m not going to tell you what healthy means or is, that’s up to the doctors. I support all women of every size that are healthy and I think all women need to be kinder to one another and recognize that the body we were given is the one we were meant to have.
I will not comment on problems of other body shapes, as I don’t know what they are and they still baffle me. I still don’t understand when a size 4/6 friend says she’s fat. I’m not saying she doesn’t feel that way, but it’s hard to understand for someone who hasn’t seen that size since before they were a teenager. All my comments and opinions come from personal experience or comments from friends that I’ve been told I can use. I do not project anything onto anyone nor do I wish for any woman to feel that she’s inadequate from reading my blog. My blog should be taken as me accepting myself for who I am and the body type that I was given. I hope it gives all women strength to accept themselves and the bodies they were given, as we are all unique.
So, back to some actual Curvy Girl Complications. I suppose that I should start from the beginning. I do want to reiterate that I do not believe my “complications” are singular or that they only apply to curvy women. I am only speaking from my own experience.
I was raised with almost all boys. My female cousins are either around 20 years older or 8 years younger. I wanted to do everything the boys did. I was a tomboy. By the time I was 12, I had skipped over an A cup straight to a C. I didn’t need to stuff my bras like the girls who teased me relentlessly. For any girl who was teased, regardless of the reason, it’s fairly devastating. My mom is petite. She’s 5’2”. At 12, I was 5’7”. I had a C cup and she didn’t really know what to do with me.
I don’t blame my mother. I asked her one time what it was like to have a daughter like me and she told me honestly that she didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t wear her clothes, her shoes or dress like her because my body wasn’t made the same way. My curvy girl complications started with me wanting to hide my curves. To be honest, I don’t think my hips caught up to my boobs for several years.
Being made fun of for being taller and “bigger” than the other girls was brutal. I hope I have never made anyone feel the way those girls made me feel. If I ever did, this is my sincerest public apology for that. I spent my second grade to eighth grade years being made fun of for one thing or another. The popular girls would “befriend” me, find out my crushes and then tell them. They seemed to live to torment me and the few friends I had.
Being a bully is never acceptable. I don’t stand for bullies of any kind. I want to leave this post with a story, not one of Curvy Girl Complications, but one to try and show how I feel that it’s important for women to support other women.
In sixth grade, the most popular girl was in my class. She stuffed her bra and wore make up and did all the things teenage girls did (excluding myself and a few others) to attract the attention of the boys. She was not a fan of reading aloud in class. The substitute teacher didn’t know this. Our regular teacher rarely called on her.
The substitute kept pestering her to read a passage and she kept refusing. Then the teacher did something that no teacher should ever do to a student and insulted her. He told her, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you didn’t know how to read.” As this would to almost any girl, this turned her into a crying girl. She fled to the bathroom. She wasn’t coming out. When a teacher’s aide asked if someone would check on her, not one of her “friends” volunteered; but, I did.
Always treat others as you wish to be treated. It’s not always easy, but women should stick together and not try to pull each other apart.
Stay tuned for the next post of Curvy Girl Complications!